"Anyone who has a problem with you doesn't know you the way I do and for that, I feel sorry for them."

I can't help but think that she's referring to me. It's funny how I was in a chat with her before & talked shit about her new-found best friend. That was back when they still didn't know each other. Is it a coincidence that they've become good friends now?

Deep down though, I really wish they never met each other. It hurts me that she, a person I used to be so close with, is getting fond of the only person I dislike. Am I a bitch for wishing that someday their friendship will eventually end? Maybe I'm still butthurt over what this whore did to me & my best friends a few months ago. I just can't bear seeing someone like her getting close to one of the sweetest people I know.

It's so fucked up & I'm definitely not pleased with this.

/edit/ ALSO WHY THE FUCK DOES MY MOM KICK ME OFF THE COMPUTER WHEN IT'S ONLY 12:30AM. i'm on my summer vacation here for pete's sake. WHY CAN'T YOU TELL YOUR HUSBAND TO GET UP ON HIS ASS & GO TO BED ALREADY SINCE HE'S THE ONE WHO HAS TO WAKE UP EARLY TOMORROW, NOT ME. WHY DO YOU HAVE TO TELL ME WHAT TO DO ARRRGGHHH. WHY IS IT ALWAYS /ME/

i'm so pissed. i'm in a bad mood tonight fml. i hate this house i hate everything.

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Had the weirdest/nicest dream last night. It was so nice that I didn't want to forget about it & actually wrote down the little details I could possibly remember.

▮slippers; hand-made heels were glued onto the soles. it was pretty cute, but the colours were gay haha. the slipper itself was blue & the heels were yellow.
▮Rocky; that kid i used to have a crush on back in elementary. he was my junior, lmao... i can't remember whether it was him in my dream or not, but the figure resembled him a lot.
▮Church
▮Dance
▮Birthday; it was my birthday for some odd reason...
▮Left slipper was broken

Most of my dreams don't make any sense, but I feel like this one was pretty clear to me. It was short & sweet. I guess I only want someone to make me feel special on my birthday -- someone who would actually acknowledge & celebrate my existence.

The sweetest part of it all was the dance. Rocky held me as if he wanted to protect me from something. It's ironic cause we were dancing in front of dozens of people. (lmao ?____?) And in my dream, I didn't feel embarrassed at all. I...guess this means I'm just a hopeless & lonely girl who wants a boyfriend. :'c

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Sometimes I wonder how I ended up having her as my mother. Why can't I be one of those spoiled, lucky kids whose parents drown them with so much love & good influence? The exact opposite of all this is happening to me, sadly enough.

She needs to learn some fucking manners & learn how to say "please" & "thank you". She needs to get rid of goddamn pride & learn how to admit defeat from time to time. She needs to stop putting all the blame on me. She needs to stop being so bossy. Lastly, she needs to stop being so moody & bitchy.

/sigh. OLD HAGS ARE SO HARD TO DEAL WITH. I WISH I WAS OUT OF THIS PLACE ALREADY, FML.

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